EXHIBITIONISTS
A sample from
Exhibitionists – Episode One:
The Bride Stripped Bare by Her Seven Bachelors
In the wake of a narrowly failed suicided attempt by Mel, the college’s life model, Helen confronts her boss George with newly revealed information which suggests he’s been behaving in a manner unbefitting to the head of a B.A. course in Fine Art.
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28. INT. GEORGE’S OFFICE. LATE MORNING. GEORGE is bouncing around on one leg, pulling on his new pants, when Helen bursts in. HELEN What kind of moron do you take me for? GEORGE What are you—? Get out! Fuck off! He retreats behind the desk. HELEN How long’d you think it’d be before someone told me? GEORGE Told you what? HELEN Your name, that’s what – your name, scorched in black marker across that girl’s stomach. GEORGE What’re you—? It said GORGE, not GEORGE. HELEN ‘Gorge’, right, and what d’you think she meant by that? GEORGE I don’t know. Maybe she was... she was... HELEN Yes...? GEORGE ...she was commenting on... on... well, on what she perceived as the... the, er, the exploitation of her body by the-- HELEN [almost laughing] Oh, come ON! GEORGE Look, if you’ve got something to say, say it, because I react very badly to that kind of thinly veiled-- HELEN I’m not veiling anything, George, I’m-- GEORGE Then say-- HELEN I will. I will say it – I’ll say it in front of your wife if you like. She turns, as if to open the door, but George leaps up, skirts round her and throws himself against it. GEORGE Leave her alone! HELEN Precisely what I said about Melanie. CUT TO: 34. INT. SAVILLE ROOM. LATE MORNING. SUE is over at FRIDA’s workspace. The baby gazes at Frida’s art pieces while the women chat, pretending not to notice the sound of muffled shouting from George’s office. Sue is rummaging for some money to give to Frida. SUE Oh, that’s a nice idea. What, get her some flowers, or...? FRIDA Mm, yes. SUE That’s a lovely idea. CUT TO: 35. INT. GEORGE’S OFFICE. LATE MORNING. George and Helen still at it. GEORGE Have you not seen that fabulous piece of arse out there? HELEN Dear God, you’re not talking about your wife? GEORGE I’m talking about the most beautiful woman in the whole of Greater Manchester. My cup runneth over with soft, sensual female flesh. If you seriously imagine I’d-- HELEN It’s not my imagination in question, George. GEORGE Fuck you, Helen. Fuck you and all who sail in you. I am Head of Studies. I don’t even have to take those classes. I could’ve delegated – to you, or Max, or any of you worthless shower of shit; God’s teeth, I could’ve put Phil in charge. But no; I have consistently made myself available to give advice and guidance-- HELEN Is that what you call it? George is silent for a moment. GEORGE Y’know what? I’ve had enough of this. He steps away from the door and goes to fetch his shoes. Helen takes a step towards freedom. You can do it yourself in future. HELEN [turning round] Do what? GEORGE Take those fucking classes, that’s what. Helen looks stunned. Well, I’m not to be trusted. HELEN What – so, you want me to... GEORGE Oh, don’t worry, you’ll be paid accordingly – you’ll get your pound of flesh. Better get on with it, though – find yourself a new model, otherwise you might end up having to get your own tits out. Wouldn’t want that, would you – shy, retiring little wallflower that you are. George exits. CUT TO: 36. INT. SAVILLE ROOM. LATE MORNING. JAMES and DANNY are chatting in James’s work area. From their perspective we see GEORGE come out of his office and stand there, confidently waiting for SUE to join him. When she does so he gives her a long and ostentatiously tonguey snog. JAMES Fucking hell, that is not right. He and Danny continue to look on in a mixture of amazement and amusement as George and family head off |
If you’d like to know more about Exhibitionists, contact Robert Cohen at bobbycoco@gmail.com